the bug has now hit Logies :( he was so easy to put down from birth to now. i mean, a dream. i still remember just weeks ago praising the ease of putting him down, turning to Trev almost nightly saying, "Wow, I still can't get over how easy that was! Just put him down [awake] and not a peep!!"
Well, the tide has turned. He got sick about a month ago and between that and teething, it's been a disaster! We're all so sleep deprived I've forgotten what a good night's rest looks like! I'm quite frankly over it but what can I do?! We're in the middle of trying a cry-it-out approach but it looks as though we have another stubborn child on our hands that will cry for an excess of 30 mins without pause. It's sad. Heartbreaking. Frustrating. Exhausting.
I question if we're doing the right thing, on the other hand, rocking him to sleep for 20 mins, putting him down just to have him start crying again and doing this combo over and over for an hour was not working either. We were both exhausted. Mentally, physically, emotionally, you name it!
Tomorrow I will try putting him down earlier. Because apparently, 7:30 isn't early enough. I will never get to spend time with my baby but hopefully, the two hours I get with him after work won't be in frustration and exhaustion!
Trev just went in for round 599 and in desperation left Luke's dreamlites in there (lol - see, we're trying everything!). I mean, did I ever hear how hard this was before I decided to have children?! How I'd wonder what life was like before children... WAS there a life before this?! Because I swear I'm living groundhogs day over and over and over and over.....
And now we have to go through this all over again with a third. I would just like to sleep for the next five years of my life PLEASE!
I really hope that one day, FIVE years from now maybe, I can look back on this post and think, "Wow, who was that crazy, desperate, sleep-deprived woman?!" Right now I'm just keeping it real and this is anything BUT fun!
Wednesday, December 26, 2012
Wednesday, December 19, 2012
He broke my heart again tonight...
which i find is happening more often these days... my 3yo is teaching me far more important lessons than I am him!
it's not fair to him that i'm always exhausted. that i'm 22 weeks pregnant and have a hard time sleeping to help with that. that i'm impatient and short. that i can't stand constant noise. i'm just not the worlds greatest mommy these days and tonight was just another reminder.
as i volunteer to put Luke down to bed tonight (usually i put Logan down and Trev puts Luke down) because "it's easy, they're both easy so sure, i'll take Luke duty tonight," and i'm brushing Luke's teeth... i lose my patience (shocker!). i have ocd with things (seems like a lot of things these days) and my "routine" with brushing Luke's teeth is brush the top, Luke gulps, swishes, spits and then i move on to the bottom teeth, Luke does his gulp/swish/spit part and then i move on to the "eeeeee" teeth clenched so i can brush the outsides...
we, not long ago, switched L to the "big boy" toothpaste that he can no longer swallow (sure, we should've done that long ago but in our more-than-one-child-put-off-anything-that-requires-more-work fashion, we lagged...). i guess i take for granted that my 3 yo is super independent, self-driven and self-sufficient because why he can't be a "stellar" swisher-spitter is beyond me (haha!)!
so tonight, we're standing at the sink. it's gets to his part of gulping/swishing/spitting and he misses the sink and spits on the vanity. HOW DID THIS HAPPEN?! WHAT IS WRONG WITH HIM?! yeah, i overreact! i get frustrated with him and say something to the effect of "Luke, i don't understand, how hard is it for you to spit in the sink?" and with the sweetest, most patient and understanding face he says to me, "Mama, I'm still yearning, that's all."
omg! DIE! DEATH! SLOW AND PAINFUL! my baby is so much wiser than his mommy! and i don't even need to apologize to gain his forgiveness (knife sinks in further) because he says, "will you sing me my favorite song before bed?"
um, yeah, you could ask for just about anything, kid, i'm putty in your hands! lol! and like that, my little 3 yo is yards bigger than his mama <3 p="p">
it's not fair to him that i'm always exhausted. that i'm 22 weeks pregnant and have a hard time sleeping to help with that. that i'm impatient and short. that i can't stand constant noise. i'm just not the worlds greatest mommy these days and tonight was just another reminder.
as i volunteer to put Luke down to bed tonight (usually i put Logan down and Trev puts Luke down) because "it's easy, they're both easy so sure, i'll take Luke duty tonight," and i'm brushing Luke's teeth... i lose my patience (shocker!). i have ocd with things (seems like a lot of things these days) and my "routine" with brushing Luke's teeth is brush the top, Luke gulps, swishes, spits and then i move on to the bottom teeth, Luke does his gulp/swish/spit part and then i move on to the "eeeeee" teeth clenched so i can brush the outsides...
we, not long ago, switched L to the "big boy" toothpaste that he can no longer swallow (sure, we should've done that long ago but in our more-than-one-child-put-off-anything-that-requires-more-work fashion, we lagged...). i guess i take for granted that my 3 yo is super independent, self-driven and self-sufficient because why he can't be a "stellar" swisher-spitter is beyond me (haha!)!
so tonight, we're standing at the sink. it's gets to his part of gulping/swishing/spitting and he misses the sink and spits on the vanity. HOW DID THIS HAPPEN?! WHAT IS WRONG WITH HIM?! yeah, i overreact! i get frustrated with him and say something to the effect of "Luke, i don't understand, how hard is it for you to spit in the sink?" and with the sweetest, most patient and understanding face he says to me, "Mama, I'm still yearning, that's all."
omg! DIE! DEATH! SLOW AND PAINFUL! my baby is so much wiser than his mommy! and i don't even need to apologize to gain his forgiveness (knife sinks in further) because he says, "will you sing me my favorite song before bed?"
um, yeah, you could ask for just about anything, kid, i'm putty in your hands! lol! and like that, my little 3 yo is yards bigger than his mama <3 p="p">
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I'm a wife to the most kind and loving husband ever, a mother to two of the most beautiful baby boys you'll ever meet (Lucas, DOB 8/29/09 and Logan, DOB 12/20/11), a children's social worker by day and a photographer by night (more like, weekend). I love to bake and only cook because we need to eat. If I relied on my dear hubby to cook for us, we'd be eating bean and cheese burritos or quesadillas for dinner every night! There are so many things that I love, but most importantly, I love being a wife and mother and this is the place where I can document our life, mostly in photographs, today.
